Visit to a Japanese Garden

In the journey called life, my path has been rather rocky lately. And as the effects of life are cumulative, you might say I had been gathering rocks for a while. The care of one’s self is, I believe, a critical aspect of any life lived well. As the saying goes, one cannot pour from an empty cup. So for the sake of my mind, body, and spirit—in other words, my whole person—I need to get away and be with myself every so often. This was one of those times.

After a week filled with rainy days and unpleasant chores, I noticed the approach of something I don’t often see: an open Sunday, free of appointments, commitments, or deadlines. Without hesitation, I called dibs on myself for the entire day and made plans to not be around. When that Sunday morning arrived, I opened my eyes and smiled from within, giving thanks for the day, for my life, and for everything that goes with it. Then, after performing my daily hygiene and grooming routine, I set off for a bit of quality alone time.

Roughly two hours from my home in the exurbs of Chicago lies the Anderson Japanese Gardens of Rockford, Illinois. Established in 1978 by Rockford businessman John Anderson, the current property occupies about 12 acres and features the work of the renowned Japanese landscape architect Hoichi Kurisu. This site has achieved recognition as one of the top Japanese gardens in North America. I made my first visit to the gardens on August 30 of 2009, with a motorcycle club over which I had been presiding at the time, based on the recommendation of a dear friend and riding buddy of mine named Vern. By sheer coincidence, I returned with another dear friend, again by motorcycle, on the exact same date in 2019. If memory serves, Vern and I returned with my son somewhere between those two visits, again by motorcycle.

This visit was to be a first on several counts. I had never been to Anderson Japanese Gardens during the fall season; I had never gone alone; and although I hadn’t realized this before now, I had never gone there by automobile. The day proved to be bright and sunny, albeit seasonably cool, exactly as had been forecast. My anticipation built as I drove on.

Upon arriving, I began to question my choice of going on a Sunday, which in hindsight was also a first. The main parking lot was nearly full, again a first, but I found a partially shaded space, walked to the welcome center entrance, bought my admission, and entered the garden. Yes, there were more people there than I had hoped to find, but I wouldn’t say it was crowded. In addition, most of the people I encountered seemed genuinely pleased to be there. Nearly everyone was smiling and the older folks, like myself, were visibly acknowledging and saying hi as we passed one another. Some even offered me helpful advice like, “There are fewer steps if you go that way.” I know, I know, old people talk. Still, I was grateful for the tip.

Using the map provided at the admission counter, I walked the entire garden. In fact, I walked some parts twice. Due to the number of visitors, I wasn’t likely to find a quiet spot where one could sit for a while and take it all in, a pleasant experience here. The garden is intended to be a place of healing and the three primary elements of any Japanese garden—stone, water, and living plants—all work toward that end.

As an aside, have you ever meditated with a tree? I mentioned this concept briefly in my post “The Things That Nearly Didn’t Happen” last year, but without much detail. Imagine sitting in view of a beautiful tree, or perhaps more than one, meditating. As you breathe in and out, fully in the moment, you see, feel, and hear a gentle breeze moving the branches and leaves on the tree. In that moment, both you and the tree are experiencing that breeze. Both you and the tree are breathing that air, although not exactly the same way. To be in that state of awareness, of oneness with the creation that surrounds you, is both peaceful and powerful. Gardens like this are designed for such experiences.

I did manage to do some simple breathing meditation as I wandered about. The fall colors were splendid, especially on such a sunny day. The ponds and waterfalls reflected the bright sunlight, yet remained peaceful elements of the gardens. While I would prefer to visit on a weekday, when the grounds are less populated, despite the number of visitors on this Sunday, I felt no desire to rush through or to leave before I had finished my experience. In all candor, I did not encounter one rude person there. Quite the opposite, in fact, I encountered more polite, even friendly, people than I would normally expect to find within a hundred miles of my home. Even the small children were, for the most part, well-behaved. In case you are wondering, yes, it feels odd that being surrounded by nice people is so noteworthy. What a sad commentary on our society!

Speaking of young people, it so happens that Anderson Japanese Gardens was hosting The Path of Pumpkins, an exhibit/competition of carved and decorated pumpkins submitted by schools in the region. Along with my admission sticker, I was given a ballot card on which to vote for whichever school I felt had submitted the best entries. The top three schools win cash prizes. I did cast my vote before leaving, but it was not an easy choice. There is apparently a good deal of artistic talent at the participating schools!

In all, I spent better than an hour and a half at the gardens, probably the longest I’ve ever stayed there. The reason I stayed so long is twofold. First, I wasn’t there with a group or with anybody, for that matter, so the only schedule I had to keep was my own, and I had none. And second, having no set schedule or agenda, I retraced a few areas just because I wanted to experience them one more time before leaving. As it turns out, I departed not a moment too soon. Just as I was rolling out of the parking lot, I observed an enormous, unmarked tour bus unloading a large number of people who had formed a queue waiting to get through the doors of the welcome center. Perfect timing, I’d say!

Before heading toward home, I opted to have something good for lunch. Prior to making this trip, I consulted a dear friend who had lived in Rockford and she provided two worthwhile suggestions. At first glance, both seemed a bit pricey, especially for a guy who would be eating alone and not trying to impress anyone, but as I have maintained for decades now, there is no substitute for local knowledge. I opted to try Baker Street Burgers, which oddly enough is located on Alpine Road (ooh a mystery). BSB is a charming place with a warm, friendly, and attentive staff. I would urge potential customers to arrive hungry, as I had. All the burger offerings are over the top and generously portioned. My order arrived looking like one of those advertisements that the fast food giants are now being sued over for not living up to the images. This thing was gorgeous and oh, so delicious!

And so ended my visit to Rockford for a delightful Japanese garden experience followed by an equally delightful early afternoon meal. I’m sure I’ll be back. As always, thanks for hanging with me.

A Tale of Two Christmas Cacti

cacti-2011-03-20f

I began with only one and given my propensity to kill houseplants, I never expected that one to last long. But it did. Then it gained a mate. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

My mother had a green thumb. She loved plants and she surrounded herself with them. Pots and planters filled her home, upstairs and down, inside and out. She knew how to take cuttings and turn them into new plants. We might be walking somewhere and Ma would spot an interesting plant. In an instant, her hand would dart out like a cobra, pinch off a tiny piece of the plant, and disappear back into her coat pocket. In a matter of weeks, the same type of plant would be growing in her collection. My sisters were afraid she would get in trouble for this, but Ma would just look at them and smile.

At some point, my mother’s horticultural interests expanded to include cactus plants and before long, all manner of cacti began to appear—not from pinching off samples, I’m sure. By the time my parents had reached their golden years, every windowsill in their basement was lined with mismatched pots brimming with these needly things. Some of the more interesting cacti joined her other plants in the kitchen, dining room, living room, and porches.

A few years before my mother passed away, which was in 2006, she gave me one of her Christmas Cactus plants, assuring me that these things were not that easy to kill. What can I tell you, this woman knew her son. Turns out she was right. The darned thing seldom threw blooms—sometimes going for months or even years—but when it did, its red flowers were beautiful to see.

cacti-2011-03-20maOver the years, “Ma’s cactus” continued to grow and thrive, but after my mother died, it would go for very long periods of time without blooming. That pattern abruptly changed, however, when my father died in February of 2011. Within days of his passing, my mother’s cactus erupted, throwing more beautiful red blooms than it had ever done for me in the years prior. Having no better explanation for this phenomenon, I took the shower of blooms as a message from my mother, sent to assure me that Pop was with her once again.

Oh, you think that’s good? Wait; there’s more.

cacti-2015-03-28popWhen the time came for my sisters and I to sell our parents’ home, decades worth of physical belongings had to be sold, donated, disposed of, or taken home. One of the things I took home was another Christmas Cactus. This specimen wasn’t quite the same as the one I already had. It seemed more rugged somehow and the flat, spiney segments were shaped just a little bit different from those of my other plant.

I wanted to keep the two cacti side by side on top of a wooden pantry in my kitchen, where they would not easily be reached by Jazzy, the family cat. But I didn’t much care for the mismatched flower pots, so I went out and bought a pair of matching ceramic pots, large enough for each plant to grow into. Once transplanted, the two quickly adapted and within a few weeks, began to flourish.

That’s when  funny thing happened. Ma’s cactus, threw a few of her red blooms—but only on the side nearest the new arrival. Hmmm, interesting.

cacti-2015-03-28A couple of days later, the other cactus began to throw beautiful, yet different, white blooms. Both plants then continued to bloom, each in its own color, until finally reverting back to their usual, quiet selves.

This happened several more times in the years that followed, most often around Christmas or Easter. In time the two Christmas cacti came to represent my parents, at least in spirit. The “Ma” plant has always had more going on, growing in different directions and always throwing more blooms, and yet she is the softer of the two plants. Her spiny segments have always been more delecate and they are quicker to droop if neglected. By comparison, the “Pop” plant is sturdier and grows its woody parts just as much as its flat segments. Like my father in life, this plant holds a grudge. If neglected, this one will let sections die off rather than come back when watered again. He also doesn’t bloom as often, but his soft, white blooms are more delicate and short -lived than her prolific red ones.

cacti-2016-12-17And so it goes. Just this past week, with Christmas approaching, Ma threw a handful of red blooms, most of them in the direction of the strong, silent plant beside her. Pop, on the other hand, hadn’t bloomed once in over a year—until a day or two ago, then a couple of tiny white buds appears on the tips of two appendages closest to the beautiful plant to his right.

I observe the banter between these two plants and remember many happy times and the colorful chatter that often took place in our household, especially during the holidays.

Merry Christmas.

 

 

I’m a Spiritual Being Living Out a Human Experience

Those of you who have visited the Crazy Horse Memorial and watched the video presentation that they show in the visitors center will immediately get why I chose Crazy Horse as my backdrop for this post. But for the benefit of those who have not yet been, I offer this brief explanation. In the video of which I speak is a gentleman who expresses his appreciation for the concept of being a spiritual being living out a human experience. I may be paraphrasing, but the point is that I share in his appreciation. I would love to give credit where credit is due, but the concept (and quotes thereof) has been attributed to more than one philosopher and used by several motivational writers/speakers, including a favorite of mine, the late Dr. Stephen Covey. So if nothing else, I find myself in pretty good company as I attempt to share a few words of my own on the subject.

I must point out that I have never written about this before—indeed I’ve only even discussed it with a select few whom I deem closest to me—so forgive me if this post comes across as sparse, disjointed, or utter nonsense. I’ll be the first to agree with you. So with that out of the way, and if you’re still reading, pull up a chair, pour yourself a drink, smoke’em if you gott’em, and let’s talk.

At face value, I’m considered a “cradle Catholic” in that I was born into the Church and am still an active member. In-between, however, lies a substantial gap of some years, during which I wandered in the desert and denied many things, including my Catholic identity. This post isn’t about all that. It’s not about religion at all, really. I only bring this up because even during that period of years, I never stopped being spiritual. I’m not even sure what that means, yet I know it to be true,with certainty.

Philosophically, I subscribe to the notion of the whole person being comprised of body, mind and spirit. If I deny any of the three, I deny a part of myself. And I am obligated to feed, nurture and develop all three in order to live fully. Believe it or not, the component with which I struggle most is the mind. Why? Because it cannot stand alone. A chemical imbalance within the body can and will cause the mind to falter. Yet an unbalanced mind can also destroy the body, either directly or indirectly. Sometimes I wonder if the mind, as we understand it, is nothing more than the intersection of body and spirit. That to me makes sense.

But what of the spirit? And what the hell is it, anyway? Yeah, I knew we would end up here sooner or later. Bear in mind, I am neither an expert nor a scholar in this matter. I can only speak from my experience, which has shaped my paradigm. My sense of things is that of the three components that make up the whole person—body, mind and spirit—the spirit is either the largest or the least contained. Surely one’s spirit can be lost or broken, but it can also stand alone. Without bringing religion into it, I can’t really get into the concept of the spirit pre-existing (or surviving) the physical person’s existence, so I won’t go there. I will say, however, that I have seen things and experienced things that have shaped my personal belief system, or B.S.for short.

Yes, I am a spiritual being living out a human experience. I like that concept. It seems to fit. If you were expecting tales of the supernatural, well, that’s not really what this is about. Besides, you gotta’ walk before you can run. Thanks for hanging with me.